Entertainment News For March 2009

In the wake of the success of the TV series Blood Ties and motion picture Twilight, it was inevitable that Lesbians with fangs would be the latest rage. Though no release dates for the USA, United Kingdom audiences will get to see Lesbian Vampire Killers on March 20th. Due to an ancient curse women of a rural Welsh village are enslaved to a flock of lesbian vampires. God I hate when that happens. Hoping to appease the blood suckers, the remaining men enlist two oblivious young men as sacrifice. If you haven't already guessed, it's a comedy. News that it stars James Corden and Mathew Horne of the hit Brit comedy series Gavin & Stacey should confirm it. Other cast members include Susie Amy (Coronation Street), Travis Oliver (Footballers Wives: Extra Time) and Silvia Colloca who also played a vampire in the Hugh Jackman blockbuster - Van Helsing. The great thing about seeing movies in the UK is, reserved seating tickets. Which is important for idiots who prefer to sit in the middle and annoy others with the sound of their dropped soda bottle as it rolls all the way down to the front row.
Continuing the theme of creatures that "suck," Here! TV brings back new episodes of it's popular campy vampire series The Lair this spring. Well known for casting porn stars and other beautiful men, the new season will feature a cameo by current porn legend Steve Cruz. Returning for the next 13 episodes are such familiar faces as Colton Ford, David Moretti, Dylan Vox, Brian Nolan and Frankie Valenti (aka Johnny Hazzard). *** The previously mentioned Dylan Vox, stars in the June release of Homewrecker. Described as a stereotype spoof of lifetime cable cable movies, the comedy centers on three Gay couples in a Wisteria Lane type neighborhood, who's idyllic lives and relationships are shaken when an aspiring single actor moves into the neighborhood. The film marks the directorial debut of Paul Hart who has previously worked mostly as an editor on such projects as Spider-man and It's My Party. ****
A gender switched role has blessed upon Julie Traymor's next film, The Tempest. In this latest version of the Bard's work, the usual male character of Prospero has become a female named Prospera, and without the expensive hormone therapy. Though Traymor's last effort, Edge of the Universe, was a box office bomb, The Tempest should garner a lot more positive attention with its stellar cast. This opulent period piece is illuminated with the talents of Oscar winner Helen Mirren, Djimon Hounsou (Blood Diamond), Alan Cumming (The L Word), Alfred Molina (Prick Up Your Ears,) Ben Whishaw (Brideshead Revisited), and the humorously controversial Russell Brand. ***
Though still no title for Mathew Damon's next Jason Bourne spy thriller, it appears that the producers have ignored MY suggestion of having Damon play an operative who can't remember his sexual identity and call it 'The Bourne Uncertainty.' Whatever it's called, mark your calendar for a Summer 2010 premiere. *** Johnathan Chase, Jarrod from Another Gay Movie, appears in the new Sandra Bullock movie All About Steve. The comedy presents Bullock as an obsessed Cross-word puzzle solver who pursues a CNN reporter, Bradley Cooper, trying to convince him that they belong together. Are we sure this isn't a remake of a Stephen King story? Opening March 6, the movie includes Thomas Haden Church (Spider-man 3), Beth Grant (Sordid Lives: the series), M.C. Gainey (Lost), and Kerri Kenney (Deputy Trudy from Reno 911!) ***
HBO continues it's reputation for unique and quality programming with the March 29th debut of The No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency. Set in the African nation of Botswana, the series is based on the novels by Alexander McCall Smith about an all-female detective agency. The show will feature Idris Elba (The Wire),David Oyelowo (The Last King of Scotland), Jill Scott (Girlfriends) and a recurring Gay character named BK, played by Desmond Dube (Hotel Rawanda.) ***
Having closed it's successful Australian run, Priscilla Queen of the Desert the musical comes to London's West End this month. The Palace Theatre will be the new home for this stage version of the hit Stephen Elliot film. Critics have hailed it as the "ultimate feel-good theatrical experience." Though unknown to USA audiences, the cast will include Jason Donovan, best known to down under tv fans for his starring role on the series Echo Beach. Stage actor Oliver Thornton takes over the role of Felicia/Adam which was played by Guy Pearce in the movie version. Thornton is a classically trained ballet student and thus has the bod to carry off the eye candy that Pearce brought to the role.
March brings needed and eagerly anticipated return of Gay characters to televison. New episodes off Greek, starring Paul James as Calvin, the Gay fraternity brother return to ABC Family. Reaper returns to the CW lineup on March 3rd featuring Ken Marino as Tony the Gay Demon whose lover ascended to become an angel. For any Republicans reading this, "Gay Demon" is NOT redundant! Over on NBC the corporate family drama, Kings, was to debut this month but will probably be rescheduled due to the additional 4 episodes ordered for the final season of E.R. When it does air, Kings promises not one but two Gay characters. One is being kept tightly under wraps, (no not cause he's at a spa) while the other is his love interest played by Michael Arden who was seen in the recent release of Bride Wars. Starting Feb. 6 on here TV, anglophiles or just fans of good television can catch the 10 part British miniseries Sugar Rush which focuses on a teenage girl and her Lesbian relationship. The series received a 2007 BAFTA Television Awards nomination and stars Olivia Hallinan which some may remember as Emma the shop girl in the Out of Time episode from Torchwood.