Call Now and Get a Peak At My Aqua Globes

Disturbing news that Vince the Sham-wow spokesperson was arrested for punching a hooker. Apparently, while locked in a kiss, the wicked city woman bit down on his tongue and wouldn't let go so Vince socked her. Vince's defense is certain to be "I was just demonstrating my new product, a self defense course called "The Sham Pow." *** Showing a polite concern for those struggling in a downturned economy, Elton John celebrated his 62nd birthday with less opulence than usual by hosting the event at what he called "a burger bar" but is best known as the LA hotspot Hamlet on Sunset. As fast food and burgers were the theme it's of no surprise that more than one guest mistook Amy Winehouse as Ronald McDonald. Other guests included Sharon and Ozzy Osborne, Cindy Crawford and Ricky Lake. The evening went smoothly except for the moments Sharon Osborne was seen carting off her husband Ozzy, he kept trying to swat the mole off Cindy Crawford's face. *** Aaron Spelling's widow, Candy has decided to sell the Spelling Manor and it can be yours for only the amount of an AIG bonus - $150 million. Sure, sounds like a lot but it's really a steal. Consider all you get from the home that Charlie's Angels and the Love Boat built. There's 4.6 acres of land, the main house is only $56,500 square feet, with bowling alley, gift wrap room, gym, barber shop and beauty shop. Poor Candy will be moving into a two story condo which is still under construction. The delay was caused due to a platinum shingle shortage in Botswanna. ***